Are you being yourself?
Recently I have had a few conversations with some friends, and we were talking about relationships. Yeah I know a regular girl conversation. However we had a coed group and I thought that maybe someone out there could use some of this information. There is my favorite quote, yes it may seem a little strange, but I belief in it, and I am teaching my boys to live by it.
To me this Dr. Seuss is a genius. He takes simple things and turns them into funny rhymes or quotes for children, whom never get the underlying meaning. Children have so much that they can teach adults, but most adults refuse to take the time to listen to their children.
I know of so many people who try to impress their "catch" so to speak, that they loose themselves, or who they wanted to be. They push aside everything they like, or belief in to make someone else happy, forgetting about themselves, NOW... I am not saying that one should be selfish, just not loose themselves in the mean time. Being yourself benefits both parties
Take me for example, I was in a relationship where at first I was me, and as I started to meet some of his friends I started to think that I need to be like some of them to make him stay interested in me, or to make his friends like me, so I became what I thought he wanted me to be, them. Well in doing so, I lost me, I didn't talk to my friends anymore, or go out with them, I didn't do anything I liked, or wanted to. Well after a while it got to me, and when I tried to be me, all it did, was push my partner away. I wasn't me anymore, I wasn't what he had become to like either. I was suffocating, I was ready to explode, I wanted to say lets do this, or go here, or lets hang out with my friends for a change. Well I ended up loosing my relationship, can't ever go back, he was in love with a person who didn't exist.
If I can teach even one person, to be themselves no matter what, then I think that I did a good thing by posting this. If I can keep one relationship alive then I did a good thing by posting this. And if I learned one thing, that would be to never, ever stop being me, cause I already did that, and it hurt more then if I was just honest with myself to begin with.
IF you are meant to be together, then it will happen, (KDI, I am keeping my fingers crossed) if you are meant to stay together, then it takes work on both ends, don't give up cause the going gets tough, don't change to make things more interesting, be yourself, but find fun things to do together, and never forget what made you fall for each other to begin with. Make time for one another, and above all don't get jealous, a jealous person isn't a pretty sight.
If you don't trust the person, then maybe there is good reason, and you shouldn't be together. God knows I have had enough experiences to not trust someone (of both sexes). Well if you wait long enough eventually someone comes around to be worthy of your trust, I waited quite a long time and went through a few long term boyfriends to find my rock. I trust him with my whole heart, and since we don't life in the same country, Trust has become a big part of our lives. most woman.
I am not being sexist by far, just trying to say that there are a lot of people out there that don't deserve your trust, so don't be with them, and that people don't just get your trust given to them, they have to earn it, and keep it. Its not a one time deal, that deal is like your bank account, you can make deposits (trusting things) or make withdrawals (Untrusting things) but you only gain when you make a deposit. That intrest will only occure, if you keep depositing.
This doesn't just go for your sexual relationships, but also with your friends, a
BE WHO YOU ARE AND SAY WHAT YOU FEEL, CAUSE THOSE THAT MIND, DON'T MATTER, AND THOSE THAT MATTER DON'T MIND By Dr. Seuss.
To me this Dr. Seuss is a genius. He takes simple things and turns them into funny rhymes or quotes for children, whom never get the underlying meaning. Children have so much that they can teach adults, but most adults refuse to take the time to listen to their children.
I know of so many people who try to impress their "catch" so to speak, that they loose themselves, or who they wanted to be. They push aside everything they like, or belief in to make someone else happy, forgetting about themselves, NOW... I am not saying that one should be selfish, just not loose themselves in the mean time. Being yourself benefits both parties
Take me for example, I was in a relationship where at first I was me, and as I started to meet some of his friends I started to think that I need to be like some of them to make him stay interested in me, or to make his friends like me, so I became what I thought he wanted me to be, them. Well in doing so, I lost me, I didn't talk to my friends anymore, or go out with them, I didn't do anything I liked, or wanted to. Well after a while it got to me, and when I tried to be me, all it did, was push my partner away. I wasn't me anymore, I wasn't what he had become to like either. I was suffocating, I was ready to explode, I wanted to say lets do this, or go here, or lets hang out with my friends for a change. Well I ended up loosing my relationship, can't ever go back, he was in love with a person who didn't exist.
If I can teach even one person, to be themselves no matter what, then I think that I did a good thing by posting this. If I can keep one relationship alive then I did a good thing by posting this. And if I learned one thing, that would be to never, ever stop being me, cause I already did that, and it hurt more then if I was just honest with myself to begin with.
IF you are meant to be together, then it will happen, (KDI, I am keeping my fingers crossed) if you are meant to stay together, then it takes work on both ends, don't give up cause the going gets tough, don't change to make things more interesting, be yourself, but find fun things to do together, and never forget what made you fall for each other to begin with. Make time for one another, and above all don't get jealous, a jealous person isn't a pretty sight.
If you don't trust the person, then maybe there is good reason, and you shouldn't be together. God knows I have had enough experiences to not trust someone (of both sexes). Well if you wait long enough eventually someone comes around to be worthy of your trust, I waited quite a long time and went through a few long term boyfriends to find my rock. I trust him with my whole heart, and since we don't life in the same country, Trust has become a big part of our lives. most woman.
I am not being sexist by far, just trying to say that there are a lot of people out there that don't deserve your trust, so don't be with them, and that people don't just get your trust given to them, they have to earn it, and keep it. Its not a one time deal, that deal is like your bank account, you can make deposits (trusting things) or make withdrawals (Untrusting things) but you only gain when you make a deposit. That intrest will only occure, if you keep depositing.
This doesn't just go for your sexual relationships, but also with your friends, a
Good friend, is one who knows everything about you, but likes you anyways. Author unknown. So ask yourself this, "Are you truly being yourself, are you able to accomplish all that you want to accomplish, or is this person holding you back from being the most spectacular person, you could be.... YOURSELF?"
posted by Pure and Simple at
11:58 PM
3 Comments:
Myself rather likes yourself, so you'd better not go changing! I had a similar quote to yours on my blog a while back: "A friend is someone who sees through you and still enjoys the view" ~Wilma Askinas
By
Squirrel, at 10:22 AM
Well Put blog, it really is one of lifes important lessons to learn.
Life is to short to cater to the dumb asses. Do unto others as you would have done to yourself, and that ISN'T just a sexual fact either!
Stand up for you!
And now, I go shopping :P
By
Fictional Correspondant, at 2:56 PM
So even a few of my friends agree with me. You are very right "DO UNTO OTHERS AS YOU WANT THEM TO DO TO YOU!" That is exactly right. You two don't you ever change.
By
Pure and Simple, at 1:15 PM
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